My Soul

wishing for the old life...
the life,
I used to love,
the life, in which
every day was a perfect one...
What
happend to me?

How do you know, a friend of yours is your BEST friend?
I think, it's a feeling... But can you loose this feeling, thinking, that the person isn't your best friend anymore? Or is it a feeling, that sticks to you your whole life?
I think, I have two best friends....
But sometimes, I have second thoughts... I mean, is there place for more than just one person as your best "best friend"?
Both or neither of them.... but today, I got the feeling, only one....
Six weeks ago (or so), I thought it was the other one... Can you replace your best friend with the other one? Or can you like one better and the next day, the other way around?

I'm sitting in my bed, my MacBook in front of me and I'm thinking about my life...
It's a thing, I should defenitely NOT think about... I'm always depressed, when I realize, that my life is not the kind of life I dream about.
Nothing is happening... well, a lt of stuff is happening, but nothing GOOD is happening!
My dad almost died yesterday in a car accident...
I made out with the guy, a friend of mine is really in love with...
I put on weight... not a little bit, but 6kg in just 5 months!
I discuss a lot with my mum lately... I'm crying almost every time!

This life sucks... I wanna have another one...

My new life will begin tomorrow... oh damn it, I said this sentence like a thousand times and I never changed my life for over a week or so.